When I was a kid, I loved to read the “Choose Your Own Adventure” stories. There was something thrilling about making choices that would determine the main character’s actions in response to the plot and its outcome. Things like “If you choose to go down the dirt path, turn to page 5″ or”If you decide to turn around and go home, turn to page 7.” The character could end up hanging to the edge of a cliff or go home to find a surprise birthday party waiting for them…and you couldn’t look ahead to help you make the “right” decision. (Okay, maybe I looked ahead once or twice…)
Little did I know that 20 years later, I would be living the life of a character in one of those books. Oh, it’s true…I go through my day, making decisions about what path I will take, never knowing if enjoyment or frustration waits for me around the corner.
I had one of these moments this morning after a doctor’s visit. I had a little less than an hour before I had to pick up Madi from preschool, Fiona was hungry, and Parker wanted to get a lollipop from the office secretary. So…
If you decide to stay in the examination room and nurse Fiona, turn to page 4.
If you decide to nurse Fiona in the trunk of your minivan while Parker eats a gooey lollipop, turn to page 7.
If you decide to drive home, nurse Fiona, repack the kids, and then go pick up Madi, turn to page 10.
Well, I was a little squeamish about spending any more time in the doctor’s office than necessary (I was imagining flu germs floating around my head), so option one was out. If I was smart, I would have just gone home and fed Fiona, but instead, I chose option two. Not sure what I was thinking, but I guess I opted for the “adventure” route, instead of anything resembling common sense.
So, there we were, in the back of our minivan, which had half of the back seat down, so there was a nice uncomfortable place for all three of us to hang out. Parker was alternating between pooping, eating his green lollipop, and freaking me out by playing with our Maclaren stroller (which has just been recalled for the possibility of fingertip amputation in the hinges). Nice.
I was trying to find a comfortable way to sit surrounded by discarded fruit snacks wrappers without further injury to my ankle. (This was, by the way, why I was at the doctor in the first place, where he told me that I should take it easy for a couple more weeks…having my ankle jammed in between our defective stroller and the seat back was probably not what he had in mind) After Fiona finished eating, I sat her up and she promptly spit up everything she just ate all down my sweatshirt and jeans, which I had just washed…yesterday.
After two diaper changes, one discarded lollipop wrapped up in a fruit snacks wrapper, three more spit up episodes, and a quick check of my facebook to see if my sister-in-law had her baby yet (no such luck…but she was having contractions), I now had 20 minutes left before Madi was done with school. Time to check my options:
If you drive directly to school to pick up Madi, turn to page 12.
If you decide to try and make five stops before picking up Madi, including your ankle x-ray, turn to page 14.
If you decide to make one stop before picking up Madi, turn to page 13.
Thankfully, I opted against the adventure choice, and just stopped to buy some hair gel for Ben before picking up Madi. It was uneventful, and we made it home without any other catastrophes.
Hmmm…perhaps I don’t choose the “safe” path often enough…stay home instead of venture out with the three kids…use a chair to nurse Fiona instead of using the trunk as a portable nursery, but it is never…ever…boring.
The End…until next time…
